Archive for the '人生感悟' Category


Michael Jackson 2001年在牛津大学的演讲(转载)

谢谢,谢谢各位亲爱的朋友,对大家如此热烈的欢迎,我由衷的表示感谢,谢谢主席,对您的盛意邀请,我感到万分荣幸。同时,我特别地感谢犹太教律法家 Shmuley,感谢您十一年来在牛津所做的工作。您和我一起努力建立“拯救儿童”,就如创作我们的直白书一样艰辛,但自始至终你都给予极大的支持和爱心。我还要感谢“拯救儿童”的理事Toba Friedman,她将于今晚返回母校,在此,她曾经作为一个Marshall学者工作过。当然还感谢我们“拯救儿童”组织的另一位中心成员 Marilyn Piels。

Thank you, thank you dear friends, from the bottom of my heart, for such a loving and spirited welcome, and thank you, Mr. President, for you kind invitation to me which I am so honored to accept. I also want to express a special thanks to you Shmuley, who for 11 years served as Rabbi here at Oxford. You and I have been working so hard to form Heal the Kids, as well as writing our book about childlike qualities, and in all of our efforts you have been such a supportive and loving friend. And I would also like to thank Toba Friedman, our director of operations at Heal the Kids, who is returning tonight to the alma mater where she served as a Marshall scholar, as well as Marilyn Piels, another central member of our Heal the Kids team.

能来到这样一个曾经汇集过特蕾莎修女、爱因斯坦、罗纳德·里根、罗伯特·肯尼迪和 Malcolm X等著名人物的地方演讲我感到受宠若惊。听说Kermit the Frog曾经来过这里,我也和他有同感就是,没有深厚阅历的人来这里可并不容易,但我相信他一定没有想到我竟会这么容易的做到。

I am humbled to be lecturing in a place that has previously been filled by such notable figures as Mother Theresa, Albert Einstein, Ronald Reagan, Robert Kennedy and Malcolm X. I’ve even heard that Kermit the Frog has made an appearance here, and I’ve always felt a kinship with Kermit’s message that it’s not easy being green. I’m sure he didn’t find it any easier being up here than I do.

今天我参观牛津大学,真的忍不住被这一伟大建筑的宏伟壮观所吸引,更不必说这世纪之城才俊云集的绚烂了。牛津不仅荟萃了最出色沉着的科学英才,还引导出了从J.R.R.托尔金到C.S.刘易斯等不少极富爱心的儿童文学家。今天,我被允许在教堂餐厅里参观了雕刻在彩色玻璃窗里的Lewis Carroll的爱丽斯梦游仙境。同时发现还有我的一位美国同胞,亲爱的苏斯先生也为此增色,启发着全世界的千万儿童的想象力。

As I looked round Oxford today, I couldn’t help but be aware of the majesty and grandeur of this great institution, not to mention the brilliance of the great and gifted minds that have roamed these streets for centuries. The walls of Oxford have not only housed the greatest philosophical and scientific geniuses — they have also ushered forth some of the most cherished creators of children’s literature, from JRR Tolkien to CS Lewis. Today I was allowed to hobble into the dining hall in Christ Church to see Lewis Carroll’s Alice in Wonderland immortalized in the stained glass windows. And even one of my own fellow Americans, the beloved Dr Seuss graced these halls and then went on to leave his mark on the imaginations of millions of children throughout the world.

今晚,我想先从我为何能有幸在这里讲话开始。

I suppose I should start by listing my qualifications to speak before you this evening.

朋友们,正如其他一些来此的演讲者不善于月球漫步一样,我也并不具备他们所拥有的学术专业知识–而且,大家都知道,爱因斯坦在这方面尤其让人敬畏。但是我可以说,比起大多数人,在其他文化方面我拥有更丰富的经验。人类文明不仅仅包括图书馆中纸墨记载的,还包括那些记在人们内心的,刻进人们灵魂的,印入人类精神的。而且朋友们,在我相对短暂的生命里我经历了这么多,以至于我真的难以相信自己只有42岁。我经常对Shmuley说我的心理年龄肯定至少有80了,今晚我甚至象个80岁老人一样走路。

Friends, I do not claim to have the academic expertise of other speakers who have addressed this hall, just as they could lay little claim at being adept at the moonwalk — and you know, Einstein in particular was really terrible at that. But I do have a claim to having experienced more places and cultures than most people will ever see. Human knowledge consists not only of libraries of parchment and ink — it is also comprised of the volumes of knowledge that are written on the human heart, chiseled on the human soul, and engraved on the human psyche. And friends, I have encountered so much in this relatively short life of mine that I still cannot believe I am only 42. I often tell Shmuley that in soul years I’m sure that I’m at least 80 - and tonight I even walk like I’m 80.

那么就请大家听我说,因为今天我一定要对大家讲的或许会让大家一起来治愈人道,拯救地球!

So please harken to my message, because what I have to tell you tonight can bring healing to humanity and healing to our planet.

多亏上帝的恩典,我很幸运地提前实现了自己一生的艺术和职业抱负。但这些成绩和我是谁,完全不同性质。事实上,在崇拜者面前活泼快乐地表演Rocking Robin和Ben的五岁小男孩并不意味笑容背后的他也同样快乐。

Through the grace of God, I have been fortunate to have achieved many of my artistic and professional aspirations realized early in my lifetime. But these, friends are accomplishments, and accomplishments alone are not synonymous with who I am. Indeed, the cheery five-year-old who belted out Rockin’ Robin and Ben to adoring crowds was not indicative of the boy behind the smile.

今晚,我不想以一个流行偶像的身份出现在大家面前,我更愿意作一代人的见证,一代不再了解作为孩子有什么意义的人。大家都有过童年,可我却缺少它,缺少那些宝贵的美妙的无忧无虑嬉戏玩耍的时光,而那些日子我们本该惬意地沉浸在父母亲人的疼爱中,为星期一重要的拼写考试下功夫做准备。熟悉The Jackson 5的朋友都知道我5岁时就开始表演,从那以后,就再也没有停止过跳舞唱歌。

Tonight, I come before you less as an icon of pop (whatever that means anyway), and more as an icon of a generation, a generation that no longer knows what it means to be children. All of us are products of our childhood. But I am the product of a lack of a childhood, an absence of that precious and wondrous age when we frolic playfully without a care in the world, basking in the adoration of parents and relatives, where our biggest concern is studying for that big spelling test come Monday morning. Those of you who are familiar with the Jackson Five know that I began performing at the tender age of five and that ever since then, I haven’t stopped dancing or singing.

虽然音乐表演的确是我最大的乐趣,可是小的时候我更想和其他的男孩子一样,搭树巢,打水仗,捉迷藏。但是命中注定我只能羡慕那些笑声和欢乐,我的职业生活不容停歇。

But while performing and making music undoubtedly remain as some of my greatest joys, when I was young I wanted more than anything else to be a typical little boy. I wanted to build tree houses, have water balloon fights, and play hide and seek with my friends.

不过,作为耶和华见证人,每个礼拜天我都要去参加教会工作,那时,我就会设想自己的童年和别人的一样充满魔力。而自从我成名以后,我就不得不用肥大的衣服,假发,胡须和眼镜把自己伪装起来。我们在加州南部的郊区度过一整天,挨家挨户串门,或者在购物中心闲逛,发放我们的了望台杂志。我也喜欢到普通的家庭里去,看那些粗毛地毯,看那些小家伙们过家家,看所有的精彩普通闪亮的日常生活情景。我知道很多人会认为这没什么大不了,可对我却充满了诱惑。我常常想自己这种没有童年的感觉是独一无二的,我想能和我分享这种感觉的人更是少之又少。

But fate had it otherwise and all I could do was envy the laughter and playtime that seemed to be going on all around me. There was no respite from my professional life. But on Sundays I would go Pioneering, the term used for the missionary work that Jehovah’s Witnesses do. And it was then that I was able to see the magic of other people’s childhood. Since I was already a celebrity, I would have to don a disguise of fat suit, wig, beard and glasses and we would spend the day in the suburbs of Southern California, going door-to-door or making the rounds of shopping malls, distributing our Watchtower magazine. I loved to set foot in all those regular suburban houses and catch sight of the shag rugs and La-Z-Boy armchairs with kids playing Monopoly and grandmas baby-sitting and all those wonderful, ordinary and starry scenes of everyday life. Many, I know, would argue that these things seem like no big deal. But to me they were mesmerizing. I used to think that I was unique in feeling that I was without a childhood. I believed that indeed there were only a handful with whom I could share those feelings.

前些时候,我有幸遇到了三,四十年代的一位童星秀兰·邓波儿,一见面我们什么都不说,只是一起哭,因为她能分担我的痛苦,这种痛苦只有我的一些密友,伊丽莎白·泰勒和麦考利·库尔金他们才能体会到。我说这些并不是要博得大家的同情,只是想让大家牢记一点——这种失去童年的痛苦不仅仅属于好莱坞的童星。

When I recently met with Shirley Temple Black, the great child star of the 1930s and 40s, we said nothing to each other at first. We simply cried together, for she could share a pain with me that only others like my close friends Elizabeth Taylor and McCauley Culkin knew. I do not tell you this to gain your sympathy but to impress upon you my first important point — it is not just Hollywood child stars that have suffered from a nonexistent childhood.

现在,这已经成为全世界的灾难。童年成了当代生活的牺牲品。我们使很多孩子不曾拥有欢乐,不曾得到相应的权利,不曾获得自由,而且还认为一个孩子就该是这样的。现在,孩子们经常被鼓励长大得快一些,好象这个叫做童年的时期是一个累赘的阶段,大人们很不耐烦地想着法儿让它尽可能地快些结束。在这个问题上,我无疑是世界上最专业的人士之一了。我这一代正是废除亲子盟约必要性的见证。

Today, it’s a universal calamity, a global catastrophe. Childhood has become the great casualty of modern-day living. All around us we are producing scores of kids who have not had the joy, who have not been accorded the right, who have not been allowed the freedom, or knowing what it’s like to be a kid. Today children are constantly encouraged to grow up faster, as if this period known as childhood is a burdensome stage, to be endured and ushered through, as swiftly as possible. And on that subject, I am certainly one of the world’s greatest experts. Ours is a generation that has witnessed the abrogation of the parent-child covenant.

心理学家在书中详述了不给予孩子绝对的爱而导致的毁灭性影响,这种无条件的爱对他们精神和人格的健康发展是极其必要的。因为被忽视,很多孩子就封闭自己。他们渐渐疏远自己的父母亲,祖父母以及其他的家庭成员,我们身边那种曾经团结过一代人的不灭的凝集力就这样散开了。这种违背常理的行为造就了一代新人,他们拥有所有外在的东西–财富,成功,时装和跑车,但他们的内心却是痛苦和空虚。胸口的空洞,心灵的荒芜,那些空白的地方曾经搏动着我们的心脏,曾经被爱占据。其实,不仅孩子们痛苦,父母亲也同样受煎熬。我们越是让孩子们早熟,我们就越来越远离了天真,而这种天真就算成年人也值得拥有。

Psychologists are publishing libraries of books detailing the destructive effects of denying one’s children the unconditional love that is so necessary to the healthy development of their minds and character. And because of all the neglect, too many of our kids have, essentially, to raise themselves. They are growing more distant from their parents, grandparents and other family members, as all around us the indestructible bond that once glued together the generations, unravels. This violation has bred a new generation, Generation O let us call it, that has now picked up the torch from Generation X. The O stands for a generation that has everything on the outside — wealth, success, fancy clothing and fancy cars, but an aching emptiness on the inside. That cavity in our chests, that barrenness at our core, that void in our center is the place where the heart once beat and which love once occupied. And it’s not just the kids who are suffering. It’s the parents as well. For the more we cultivate little adults in kids’ bodies, the more removed we ourselves become from our own childlike qualities, and there is so much about being a child that is worth retaining in adult life.

爱,女士们先生们,爱是人类家庭最珍贵的遗产,是最贵重的馈赠,是最无价的传统,是我们应该代代相传的财富。以前,我们或许没有现在所享受的富有,房子里可能没有电,很多孩子挤在没有取暖设施的狭小房间里。但这些家庭里没有黑暗,也没有寒冷。他们点燃爱之光,贴紧的心让他们感到温暖。父母不为各种享受和权利的欲望分心,孩子才是他们的生活中最重要的。

Love, ladies and gentlemen, is the human family’s most precious legacy, its richest bequest, its golden inheritance. And it is a treasure that is handed down from one generation to another. Previous ages may not have had the wealth we enjoy. Their houses may have lacked electricity, and they squeezed their many kids into small homes without central heating. But those homes had no darkness, nor were they cold. They were lit bright with the glow of love and they were warmed snugly by the very heat of the human heart. Parents, undistracted by the lust for luxury and status, accorded their children primacy in their lives.

我们都知道,我们两国在托马斯·杰弗逊提出的所谓“几个不可妥协的权利”上决裂。当我们美国人和英国人在争执各自要求的公平时,又有什么关于孩子们不可妥协的权利之争呢,对这些权利的逐步剥夺已经导致了世界上的很多孩子失去欢快乐趣和童年的安全感。因此我建议今晚我们就为每个家庭建立一部全体儿童权利条约,这些条例是:

As you all know, our two countries broke from each other over what Thomas Jefferson referred to as “certain inalienable rights.” And while we Americans and British might dispute the justice of his claims, what has never been in dispute is that children have certain inalienable rights, and the gradual erosion of those rights has led to scores of children worldwide being denied the joys and security of childhood. I would therefore like to propose tonight that we instal in every home a Children’s Universal Bill of Rights, the tenets of which are:

不必付出就可享受的被爱的权利

不必乞求就可享有的被保护的权利

即使来到这个世界时一无所有,也要有被重视的权利

即使不引人注意也会有被倾听的权利

不须要与晚间新闻和复活节抗争,就能在睡觉前听一段故事的权利

不须要躲避子弹,可以在学校受教育的权利

哪怕你只有妈妈才会爱的脸蛋,也要有被人尊重的权利。

The right to be loved, without having to earn it

The right to be protected, without having to deserve it

The right to feel valuable, even if you came into the world with nothing

The right to be listened to without having to be interesting

The right to be read a bedtime story without having to compete with the evening news or EastEnders

The right to an education without having to dodge bullets at schools

The right to be thought of as adorable (even if you have a face that only a mother could love).

朋友们,人类所有知识的创立,人类意识的萌芽必然需要我们每一个人都成为被爱的对象。哪怕你不知道自己的头发是红色还是棕色,不知道自己是白人还是黑人,不知道自己信仰哪个宗教,你也应该知道自己是被爱着的。

Friends, the foundation of all human knowledge, the beginning of human consciousness, must be that each and every one of us is an object of love. Before you know if you have red hair or brown, before you know if you are black or white, before you know of what religion you are a part, you have to know that you are loved.

大概十二年前,我正好在准备我的真棒巡演,一个小男孩和他的父母亲来加州看我。癌症正在威胁着他的生命,他告诉我他非常爱我和我的音乐。他的父母告诉我他生命将尽,说不上哪一天就会离开,我就对他说:“你瞧,三个月之后我就要到堪萨斯州你住的那个城市去开演唱会,我希望你来看我的演出,我还要送给你一件我在一部录影带里穿过的夹克。”他眼睛一亮,说:“你要把它送给我?” 我说:“当然,不过你必须答应我穿着它来看我的演出。”我只想尽力让他坚持住,就对他说:“我希望在我的演唱会上看见你穿着这件夹克戴着这只手套。”于是,我又送了一只镶着莱茵石的手套给他。一般我决不送手套给别人。但他就要去天堂了。不过,也许他离那儿实在太近,我到他的城市时,他已经走了,他们埋葬他时给他穿上那件夹克戴上那只手套。他只有10岁。上帝知道,我知道,他曾经多么努力地支持过。但至少,在他离开时,他知道自己是被深爱着的,不仅被父母亲,甚至还有几乎是个陌生人的我也同样爱他。拥有了这些爱,他知道他不是孤独地来到这个世界,同样也不是孤独地离开。

About 12 years ago, when I was just about to start my Bad tour, a little boy came with his parents to visit me at home in California. He was dying of cancer and he told me how much he loved my music and me.

His parents told me that he wasn’t going to live, that any day he could just go, and I said to him: “Look, I am going to be coming to your town in Kansas to open my tour in three months. “I want you to come to the show. I am going to give you this jacket that I wore in one of my videos.” His eyes lit up and he said: “You are gonna give it to me?” I said “Yeah, but you have to promise that you will wear it to the show.” I was trying to make him hold on. I said: “When you come to the show I want to see you in this jacket and in this glove” and I gave him one of my rhinestone gloves — and I never usually give the rhinestone gloves away. And he was just in heaven. But maybe he was too close to heaven, because when I came to his town, he had already died, and they had buried him in the glove and jacket. He was just 10 years old. God knows, I know, that he tried his best to hold on. But at least when he died, he knew that he was loved, not only by his parents, but even by me, a near stranger, I also loved him. And with all of that love he know that he didn’t come into this world alone, and he certainly didn’t leave it alone.

如果你降临或离开这个世界时都感到被爱,那么这些时间里发生的所有意外你都能对付得了。教授可能降你的级,可你自己并没有降级,老板可能排挤你,可你不会被排挤掉,一个辩论对手可能会击败你,可你却仍能胜利。他们怎么能真正战胜你击倒你呢?因为你知道你是值得被爱的,其余的只是一层包装罢了。可是,如果你没有被爱的记忆,你就无法发现世界上有什么东西能够让你充实。无论你挣了多少钱,无论你有多出名,你仍然觉得空虚。

If you enter this world knowing you are loved and you leave this world knowing the same, then everything that happens in-between can he dealt with. A professor may degrade you, but you will not feel degraded, a boss may crush you, but you will not be crushed, a corporate gladiator might vanquish you, but you will still triumph. How could any of them truly prevail in pulling you down? For you know that you are an object worthy of love. The rest is just packaging. But if you don’t have that memory of being loved, you are condemned to search the world for something to fill you up. But no matter how much money you make or how famous you become, you will still feel empty.

你真正寻找的只是无条件的爱和完全的包容。而这些在你诞生时就被拒绝给予。朋友们,让我给大家描述一下这样的情景,在美国每一天将有–6个不满 20岁的青年自杀,12个20岁以下的孩子死于武器—记住这只是一天,不是一年。另外还有399个年轻人因为服用麻醉品而被逮捕,1352个婴儿被十几岁的妈妈生出来,这都发生在世界上最富有最发达的国家。

What you are really searching for is unconditional love, unqualified acceptance. And that was the one thing that was denied to you at birth. Friends’ let me paint a picture for you. Here is a typical day in America - six youths under the age of 20 will commit suicide, 12 children under the age of 20 will die from firearms — remember this is a day, not a year. Three hundred and ninety-nine kids will be arrested for drug abuse, 1,352 babies will be born to teen mothers. This is happening in one of the richest, most developed countries in the history of the world.

是的,我国所充斥的暴力,其他的工业化国家无法相提并论。这只是美国年轻人宣泄自己所受的伤害和愤怒的途径,但是,难道英国就没有同样烦恼痛苦的人么?调查表明英国每小时都会有三个十来岁的孩子自残,经常割烫自己的身体或者服用过量药剂。这是他们现在用来发泄痛苦烦恼的方法。在大不列颠,有20%的家庭一年只能聚在一起吃一次晚饭,一年才一次!

Yes, in my country there is an epidemic of violence that parallels no other industrialized nation. These are the ways young people in America express their hurt and their anger. But don’t think that there is not the same pain and anguish among their counterparts in the UK. Studies in this country show that every single hour, three teenagers in the UK inflict harm upon themselves, often by cutting or burning their bodies or taking an overdose. This is now they have chosen to cope with the pain of neglect and emotional agony. In Britain, as many as 20% of families will only sit down and have dinner together once a year. Once a year!

80年代的研究发现,听教多的孩子都有较强的识读能力和动手能力,而且,远比看着学的有效果。然而,英国只有不到33%的二至八岁的孩子才能固定地在晚睡前听段故事。如果我们没有意识到75%的家长在他们的那个年龄都是听着故事过来的,那么大家可能就不会想到什么了。很显然,我们没有问过自己这些痛苦愤怒和暴力从何而来。不言而喻,孩子们特别憎恨被忽略,害怕冷漠,他们哭泣只是为了引起注意。在美国,各种儿童保护机构表示,平均每年,有千万儿童成为了因忽略冷漠是受害者,这是一种虐待!富有的家庭,幸运的家庭,完全被电子器件束缚了。父母亲回到家里,可是他们没有真正回家,他们的灵魂还在办公室。

And what about the time-honored tradition of reading your kid a bedtime story? Research from the 1980s showed that children who are read to, had far greater literacy and significantly outperformed their peers at school. And yet, less than 33% of British children ages two to eight have a regular bedtime story read to them. You may not think much of that until you take into account that 75% of their parents did have that bedtime story when they were that age. Clearly, we do not have to ask ourselves where all of this pain, anger and violent behavior comes from. It is self-evident that children are thundering against the neglect, quaking against the indifference and crying out just to be noticed. The various child protection agencies in the US say that millions of children are victims of maltreatment in the form of neglect, in the average year. Yes, neglect. In rich homes, privileged homes, wired to the hilt with every electronic gadget. Homes where parents come home, but they’re not really home, because their heads are still at the office.

那么孩子们呢?啊,只好以他们所能得到的一些感情的碎片勉强过活。在无休止的电视,电脑游戏和录像带上又能得到多少呢!这些让我觉得扭曲灵魂震撼心灵的又冷又硬的东西正好可以让大家明白,我为什么要花费这么多时间精力来支援拯救孩子的活动让它能获得巨大的成功。我们的目的很简单——重建父母儿女之间的融洽关系,重许我们的承诺去点亮所有终究有一天会来到这个世界美丽孩子们的前行路途。(这次公开演讲之后,你们能对我敞开心扉,我觉得我会和你们聊更多。不过如果对我们每个人各自的故事都作统计的话就可能侵犯个人隐私了。)常言道,抚养孩子就像跳舞。你走一步,你的孩子跟一步。而我发觉养育孩子时,你对孩子的付出只是故事的一半,而另一半就是孩子对父母的回报。

And their kids? Well, their kids just make do with whatever emotional crumbs they get. And you don’t get much from endless TV, computer games and videos. These hard, cold numbers which for me, wrench the soul and shake the spirit, should indicate to you why I have devoted so much of my time and resources into making our new Heal the Kids initiative a colossal success. Our goal is simple - to recreate the parent/child bond, renew its promise and light the way forward for all the beautiful children who are destined one day to walk this earth. But since this is my first public lecture, and you have so warmly welcomed me into your hearts, I feel that I want to tell you more. We each have our own story, and in that sense statistics can become personal. They say that parenting is like dancing. You take one step, your child takes another. I have discovered that getting parents to rededicate themselves to their children is only half the story. The other half is preparing the children to reaccept their parents.

在我小时候,我记得我们有一只名叫“黑姑娘”的狼狗,她不仅不能看家,而且很胆小并且神经质,甚至对卡车的声音和印地安那的雷雨也恐惧不已,我的妹妹珍妮和我在她身上下了不少心,但是我们没能赢得她的信任,她以前的主人总是打她,我们不知道为了什么,但是无论因为什么,这尚不足以使这条狗丧失忠诚。

When I was very young I remember that we had this crazy mutt of a dog named Black Girl, a mix of wolf and retriever. Not only wasn’t she much of a guard dog, she was such a scared and nervous thing that it is a wonder she did not pass out every time a truck rumbled by, or a thunderstorm swept through Indiana. My sister Janet and I gave that dog so much love, but we never really won back the sense of trust that had been stolen from her by her previous owner.

如今许多冷漠的年轻人都是受伤害的可怜人。他们一点也不关心他们的父母。他们独来独往,捍卫他们的独立。他们不停地向前,而把父母抛在了后面。还有更糟的孩子,他们怨恨父母,甚至父母的任何可能的提议都会被激烈地驳回。

We knew he used to beat her. We didn’t know with what. But whatever it was, it was enough to suck the spirit right out of that dog. A lot of kids today are hurt puppies who have weaned themselves off the need for love. They couldn’t care less about their parents. Left to their own devices, they cherish their independence. They have moved on and have left their parents behind.

今晚,我不希望我们之中任何人犯这样的错误,这就是为什么我正号召全世界的孩子–和我们今晚在场的人一起开始–宽恕我们的父母,如果我们觉得被忽略,那么宽恕他们并且教他们怎样爱。 听到我没有一个幸福童年时您可能并不吃惊,我和我父亲的紧张关系就是一例。

Then there are the far worse cases of children who harbor animosity and resentment toward their parents, so that any overture that their parents might undertake would be thrown forcefully back in their face. Tonight, I don’t want any of us to make this mistake. That’s why I’m calling upon all the world’s children — beginning with all of us here tonight — to forgive our parents, if we felt neglected. Forgive them and teach them how to love again. You probably weren’t surprised to hear that I did not have an idyllic childhood. The strain and tension that exists in my relationship with my own father is well documented.

我父亲是个严厉的人,从记事起,他努力地让我们尽量做好的演员,他不善于表达爱,他从不说他爱我,也从未夸奖我,如果我表现的很棒,他会说不错,如果我表现的还行,他就什么也不说,让我们取得事业的成功是他最热切的希望,我的父亲是个天才管理者,我和我的哥哥们在事业上不成功,他就以强迫的方式,让我成为一个演员,在他的指导下,我没有错过任何一个机遇,但我真正想要的是一个让我感觉到爱的父亲,我的父亲却不是这样,在他直视着我时从不说爱我,从未和我玩过一个游戏,没有玩过骑马,没有扔过枕头,没有玩过水球,但我记得我四岁那年,有一个小的狂欢节,他把我放在小马上,这样小的一个动作,或许他五分钟就忘记了,但因为那一刻,在我心里,他有了一个特别的位置,这就是孩子,很小的事情对他们意味着很多,对我亦如此,那一刻意味着一切,我仅仅经历过一次,但那感觉真好,对他也是对世界的感觉!

My father is a tough man and he pushed my brothers and me hard, from the earliest age, to be the best performers we could be. He had great difficulty showing me affection. He never really told me he loved me. And he never really complimented me either. If I did a great show, he would tell me it was a good show. And if I did an OK show, he would say nothing. He seemed intent, above all else, on making us a commercial success. And at that he was more than adept. My father was a managerial genius and my brothers and I owe our professional success, in no small measure, to the forceful way that he pushed us. He trained me as a showman and under his guidance I couldn’t miss a step. But what I really wanted was a Dad. I wanted a father who showed me love. And my father never did that. He never said I love you while looking me straight in the eye, he never played a game with me. He never gave me a piggyback ride, he never threw a pillow at me, or a water balloon. But I remember once when I was about four years old, there was a little carnival and he picked me up and put me on a pony. It was a tiny gesture, probably something he forgot five minutes later. But because of that moment I have this special place in my heart for him. Because that’s how kids are, the little things mean so much to them and for me, that one moment meant everything. I only experienced it that one time, but it made me feel really good, about him and the world.

但是现在我自己也当爸爸了,有一天我正在想着我自己的孩子Prince、Paris,还有我希望他们长大后怎样看我。我肯定的是,我希望他们想起我的时候,能记得我不管去哪,都要他们在我身边,想起我如何总是把他们放在一切之前。但他们的生活里总是有挑战。因为我的孩子们总是被那些八卦小报跟踪,他们也不能和我经常去公园或者影院。

But now I am a father myself, and one day I was thinking about my own children, Prince and Paris and how I wanted them to think of me when they grow up. To be sure, I would like them to remember how I always wanted them with me wherever I went, how I always tried to put them before everything else. But there are also challenges in their lives. Because my kids are stalked by paparazzi, they can’t always go to a park or a movie with me.

所以如果他们长大了之后怨恨我,那又怎么样呢?我的选择给他们的童年带来了多大的影响?他们也许会问,为什么我们没有和其他孩子一样的童年呢?在那一刻,我祈祷,我的孩子能够理解我。他们会对自己说:“我们的爸爸已经尽了他最大努力,他面对的是独一无二的状况。他或许不完美,但他却是个温和正派的人,想把这世上所有的爱都给我们。”

So what if they grow older and resent me, and how my choices impacted their youth? Why weren’t we given an average childhood like all the other kids, they might ask? And at that moment I pray that my children will give me the benefit of the doubt. That they will say to themselves: “Our daddy did the best he could, given the unique circumstances that he faced. ” He may not have been perfect, but he was a warm and decent man, who tried to give us all the love in the world.”

我希望他们能总是把焦点放在那些积极的方面,比如我心甘情愿为他们做出的牺牲;而不是那些他们不得不放弃的事情,或我在抚养他们的过程中犯过的或不能避免犯下的错误。因为我们都曾是他人的孩子,而且我们都清楚,尽管有非常好的计划和努力,错误仍总是会发生。因为人孰无过?

I hope that they will always focus on the positive things, on the sacrifices I willingly made for them, and not criticize the things they had to give up, or the errors I’ve made, and will certainly continue to make, in raising them. For we have all been someone’s child, and we know that despite the very best of plans and efforts, mistakes will always occur. That’s just being human.

当我想到这,想到我是多么希望我的孩子不会觉得我不够好,而且会原谅我的缺点时,我不得不想起我自己的父亲,不管我之前是多么地否定他,我必须承认他一定是爱我的。他的确爱我,我知道的。从一件小事就可以看出来,在我小时候,非常喜欢吃甜食–孩子们都这样。我父亲知道我最喜欢吃面包圈。于是每隔几个星期,当我早上从楼上下来时,我都会再厨房的柜台上发现一整袋面包圈–没有字条、没有说明。就像是圣诞老人送来的礼物。

And when I think about this, of how I hope that my children will not judge me unkindly, and will forgive my shortcomings, I am forced to think of my own father and despite my earlier denials, I am forced to admit that me must have loved me. He did love me, and I know that. There were little things that showed it. When I was a kid I had a real sweet tooth — we all did. My favorite food was glazed doughnuts and my father knew that. So every few weeks I would come downstairs in the morning and there on the kitchen counter was a bag of glazed doughnuts — no note, no explanation — just the doughnuts. It was like Santa Claus.

有时我曾经想熬夜藏在一边,以看到他把它们留在那里。但就像对待圣诞老人的传说那样,我不想破坏掉这种神奇幻想,更害怕他再也不会继续。我的父亲得晚上悄悄地把它们留在那里,并不让任何人知道。他害怕提及人类的情感。他不懂也不知道怎么处理。但他就懂得面包圈对我的意义。

Sometimes I would think about staying up late at night, so I could see him leave them there, but just like with Santa Claus, I didn’t want to ruin the magic for fear that he would never do it again. My father had to leave them secretly at night, so as no one might catch him with his guard down. He was scared of human emotion, he didn’t understand it or know how to deal with it. But he did know doughnuts.

当我打开记忆的洪闸时,更多的回忆涌现出来,那些关于一些微妙动作的记忆,尽管已经不太清晰,但绝对体现了他再尽力而为。于是今晚,与其专注于我父亲没有作到什么,我更愿意专注于所有他历尽艰难尽力作到的事情。我想停止对他的判断。

And when I allow the floodgates to open up, there are other memories that come rushing back, memories of other tiny gestures, however imperfect, that showed that he did what he could. So tonight, rather than focusing on what my father didn’t do, I want to focus on all the things he did do and on his own personal challenges. I want to stop judging him.

我回想我的父亲是在南方一个非常贫穷的家庭长大的。他来自大萧条时期,而我的父亲的奋力养育着孩子们的父亲,也没有对家庭表现出多少慈爱,我的父亲和其他兄弟姐妹在爷爷的铁拳下长大。谁设想过一个在南方长大的黑人的处境?没有尊严,没有希望,想拼力在这个视我父亲为下贱种的世界里争得立足之地。我是第一个登上MTV台的黑人艺人,我还记得那有多艰难,但那还是在80年代!后来我父亲搬到印地安那州并且有了自己的大家庭,他在炼钢厂长时间的工作,那工作很低下,而且对肺有损害,这一切都是为了家。这是否很奇怪,因为他艰于表达?这是否很神秘,因为他的心那样饱经沧桑?最重要的,这是否不可理解,因为他逼他的儿子去走演艺成功之路?–为了免于再过受侮辱和贫穷的生活,我开始明白就连父亲的咆哮也是一种爱,一种不完美的爱,但是尽管如此,他逼我因为他爱我,因为他希望没人会鄙视他的子女,现在,想起曾经的苦难,我感到幸福。在愤怒中,我发现了超脱,在复仇中,我发现了和解,就连最初的愤怒也慢慢变成了宽恕。

I have started reflecting on the fact that my father grew up in the South, in a very poor family. He came of age during the Depression and his own father, who struggled to feed his children, showed little affection towards his family and raised my father and his siblings with an iron fist. Who could have imagined what it was like to grow up a poor black man in the South, robbed of dignity, bereft of hope, struggling to become a man in a world that saw my father as subordinate. I was the first black artist to be played on MTV and I remember how big a deal it was even then. And that was in the 80s! My father moved to Indiana and had a large family of his own, working long hours in the steel mills, work that kills the lungs and humbles the spirit, all to support his family. Is it any wonder that he found it difficult to expose his feelings? Is it any mystery that he hardened his heart, that he raised the emotional ramparts? And most of all, is it any wonder why he pushed his sons so hard to succeed as performers, so that they could be saved from what he knew to be a life of indignity and poverty? I have begun to see that even my father’s harshness was a kind of love, an imperfect love, to be sure, but love nonetheless. He pushed me because he loved me. Because he wanted no man ever to look down at his offspring. And now with time, rather than bitterness, I feel blessing. In the place of anger, I have found absolution. And in the place of revenge I have found reconciliation. And my initial fury has slowly given way to forgiveness.

差不多十年前,我建立了一个叫“拯救世界”的慈善机构,这名字本身正是我潜藏的感觉,就我知道的一点,正如Shmuley后来指出的那样,那两个字是古老预言实现的基础,我们真的能拯救世界吗?这个问题直到今天一直被战争以及人种问题困绕着。我们真的能够拯救孩子吗?那些带枪进学校满怀仇恨甚至向同学开枪的孩子,那些将被打或者已打死的孩子,就像Jamie Bulger的悲剧故事,我们真的可以吗?是的,否则我今晚不会站在这里。

Almost a decade ago, I founded a charity called Heal the World. The title was something I felt inside me. Little did I know, as Shmuley later pointed out, that those two words form the cornerstone of Old Testament prophecy. Do I really believe that we can heal this world, that is riddled with war and genocide, even today? And do I really think that we can heal our children, the same children who can enter their schools with guns and hatred and shoot down their classmates, like they did at Columbine? Or children who can beat a defenseless toddler to death, like the tragic story of Jamie Bulger? Of course I do, or I wouldn’t be here tonight.

但是这一切都从宽恕开始,因为要拯救世界我们必须首先拯救自己。而要拯救孩子,我们首先要保护孩子的内心,人人有责,作为一个成年人,我意识到我不能作为一个完整的人存在,或者作为有能力无条件给予爱的父母,直到我童年的灵魂找到依靠。这也是今晚我让大家做的事情。无愧于十大戒律第五条。敬爱你们的父母而不是褒贬他们,这就是为什么我要宽恕我的父亲并且不再评论他,因为我只想要一个“父亲”,这也是我唯一得到的。

But it all begins with forgiveness, because to heal the world, we first have to heal ourselves. And to heal the kids, we first have to heal the child within, each and every one of us. As an adult, and as a parent, I realize that I cannot be a whole human being, nor a parent capable of unconditional love, until I put to rest the ghosts of my own childhood. And that’s what I’m asking all of us to do tonight. Live up to the fifth of the 10 Commandments. Honor your parents by not judging them. Give them the benefit of the doubt. That is why I want to forgive my father and to stop judging him. I want to forgive my father, because I want a father, and this is the only one that I’ve got.

我想卸掉一切包袱和我父亲和好,来度过我的余生,不受过去阴影的妨碍。如果世界充满仇恨,我们仍然安于**,如果世界充满愤怒,我们仍然敢于安慰,如果世界充满绝望,我们仍然敢于憧憬,如果世界充满猜度,我们仍然敢于信任,今晚让父母失望的人们,我要你们对自己的沮丧失望,今晚感觉被父母亲欺骗的人们,我要你们不要再欺骗自己,今晚所有希望将父母踢开的人们,我要你们把手伸向他们。

I want the weight of my past lifted from my shoulders and I want to be free to step into a new relationship with my father, for the rest of my life, unhindered by the goblins of the past. In a world filled with hate, we must still dare to hoe. In a world filled with anger, we must still dare to comfort. In a world filled with despair, we must still dare to dream. And in a world filled with distrust, we must still dare to believe. To all of you tonight who feel let down by your parents, I ask you to let down your disappointment. To all of you tonight who feel cheated by your fathers or mothers, I ask you not to cheat yourself further. And to all of you who wish to push your parents away, I ask you to extend you hand to them instead.

我在要求你,我在要求我自己,把无条件的爱给我们的父母,这样他们会从他们的孩子那里学会爱,这样会最终重建一个爱的世界。Shmuley曾提到古书上的预言–新的世界将要到来,–当父母的心换回孩子的心的时候。

I am asking you, I am asking myself, to give our parents the gift of unconditional love, so that they too may learn how to love from us, their children. So that love will finally be restored to a desolate and lonely world. Shmuley once mentioned to me an ancient Biblical prophecy which says that a new world and a new time would come, when “the hearts of the parents would be restored through the hearts of their children.”

我的朋友们,我们就是那个世界,我们就是那些孩子。

My friends, we are that world, we are those children.

圣雄甘地曾说:“弱者从不原谅,宽恕是强者的属性。”今晚,作一个强者,并且超越强者,迎接最大的挑战–治愈感情的创伤,我们一定能克服,无论我们童年受的伤害对生活的影响有多大,假定你的父母是无辜的,宽恕每个人,就赢得每个人,成千上万孩子和他们的父母对宽恕的呼唤,或许在这一刻没有结果,但这至少是一个开始,我们所有人都乐意看到的开始。

Mahatma Gandhi said: “The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.”Tonight, be strong. Beyond being strong, rise to the greatest challenge of all — to restore that broken covenant. We must all overcome whatever crippling effects our childhoods may have had on our lives and in the words of Jesse Jackson, forgive each other, redeem each other and move on. This call for forgiveness may not result in Oprah moments the world over, with thousands of children making up with their parents, but it will at least be a start, and we’ll all be so much happier as a result.

好了女士们先生们,我对我今晚的讲话评价是:自信,有趣,激动。从今往后,或许可以听到一首新歌。

And so ladies and gentlemen, I conclude my remarks tonight with faith, joy and excitement. From this day forward, may a new song be heard.

让这新歌是孩子们的欢笑。

让这新歌是孩子们的玩闹。

让这新歌是孩子们的歌唱。

让这新歌可以让所有的父母听到。

让我们一起创作一首心灵的交响曲,创造一个让我们的孩子们沐浴在爱里的奇迹。

让我们拯救世界,让伤痛枯萎。 我们一同创作最美的音乐。

愿上帝保佑你们,我爱你们。

Let that new song be the sound of children laughing.

Let that new song be the sound of children playing.

Let that new song be the sound of children singing.

And let that new song be the sound of parents listening.

Together, let us create a symphony of hearts, marveling at the miracle of our children and basking in the beauty of love.

Let us heal the world and blight its pain. And may we all make beautiful music together.

God bless you, and I love you.”

在孩子的眼里,什么是爱(转载)

一组专业人员向一群四到八岁的孩子问了这样一个问题:“爱是什么意思?”

结果答案的广度和深度却出乎所有人意料之外。看看你是怎么想的……

1. “我奶奶得了关节炎,再也不能弯下来涂脚趾甲。于是我爷爷总是给她涂,甚至当他自己的手得了关节炎也是这样。这就是爱。”

丽贝卡- 八岁

2. “当有人爱上你,他说你名字的方式是不一样的。你就知道你的名字在他嘴里说出来感觉棒极了。”

比利 - 四岁

3. “爱就是女孩抹香水男孩涂古龙水,然后他们出去,互相闻着。”

卡尔 - 五岁

4. “爱就是当你出去吃饭时,你把自己大部分薯条给某个人,而却并不在意他是不是也给你。”

克里希- 六岁

5. “爱就是在你累的时候让你笑起来的东西。”

特里- 四岁

6. “爱就是当我妈咪给爹地泡咖啡,在给他之前先尝一口,看看味道是不是还可以。”

丹尼 - 七岁

7. “爱就是你们一直接吻的时候。然后你们厌烦了接吻,但你们仍然想呆在一起,而且你们聊得更多。妈咪和爹地就是这样的。他们接吻的时候,看上去很下流。”

艾蜜俐 - 八岁

8. “爱就是圣诞节当你在房间里拆开礼物时,让你停下来去听的东西。”

鲍比 - 七岁 (哇!)

9. “如果你想学着爱得更好,就应该从爱你所恨的人开始。”

妮卡 - 六岁

(在这个星球上我们需要千千万万更多的小妮卡们)

10. “爱就是当你告诉一个男孩你喜欢他的衬衫,他就每天都穿着它。”

诺艾尔 - 七岁

11. “爱就像一个小老太婆和一个小老头儿,尽管他们彼此很了解,但却仍然是朋友。”

汤米 - 六岁

12. “在钢琴独奏会上,我在台上,很紧张。望着台下,所有人都在看我。我看到爹地冲我挥手微笑,只有他一个人这么做。我就不再感到紧张了。”

辛迪 - 八岁

13. “妈咪爱我胜过所有人。没有人像她那样在晚上吻着我入睡。”

克莱尔 - 六岁

14. “爱就是在妈咪把最好的鸡块给爹地的时候。”

伊莱恩 -五岁

15. “爱就是妈咪看到爹地一身臭汗的样子却仍然说他比劳勃·瑞福还帅。”

克莉丝 - 七岁

16. “爱就是你一整天扔下你的小狗狗不管,而它却仍然舔你的脸的时候。”

玛丽·安 - 四岁

17. “我知道我姐姐爱我,因为她把她所有的旧衣服都给了我,而她却不得不出去买新的。”

劳伦 - 四岁

18. “当你爱上某个人,你的睫毛忽上忽下的,小星星从里面出来。” (这会是什么样子)

卡伦 - 七岁

19. “爱就是当妈咪进卫生间看到爹地在里面,而她却并不觉得恶心的时候。”

马克 - 六岁

20. “你真的不能说出‘我爱你’,除非你是来真的。但是一旦你是来真的,你就应该经常说。人们总是忘记。”

杰西卡 - 八岁

21. 最后一个 — 作家兼讲师里欧·布斯加利亚曾经谈到一次比赛,当时他被邀去当评委。那次比赛是要评出最有爱心的小孩。获胜者是一个四岁的孩子,他的邻居是一位新近丧妻的老者。这个小男孩看到那个老人哭泣,便走进他的院子,爬到他的膝上,然后就坐在那儿。后来他妈妈问他对那个邻居说了什么,小男孩说:“什么也没说,我只是帮着他哭。”

幸福 ( from 几米)

我们不察觉自己的幸福
因为我们不知道
有些痛楚失望 悲欢离合
也是幸福
不是不知道幸福,而是我们有时候太贪心

有些失去是注定的
有些缘分是永远不会有结果的

爱一个人不一定要拥有
但拥有一个人就一定要去好好地爱他
有时候会想 要是能重来该有多好
其实真有重来的时候 
也许并不一定能尽如人意

得不一定就是得
失不一定就是失

我们这一生
注定要走一些今生认为不该走的路
在今生爱一些不该爱的人
做一些不该做的事
但是最终的结局
却仍是那样的

我们从来没有自己所以为的那么爱一个人
我们去追寻爱
只是去寻找一个在某个地方的部份自己
我们因为爱人和被爱而了解自己
那些被我们爱过的人只是孕育我们的人生

人生的诸多美丽
也许可以再创造
但却不可再重复
过去了就过去了
因此 我们每次亲历的美好
不论感情的 还是物质的
对我们的人生来说
是第一次的时候
也都是最后一次

也许有些话
永远也不可能从你期望的人的口中说出
但是
当有些人从心底讲出这些话
也请你不要走开
我们为一个承诺感动
却也害怕承担一个承重的盟约

jimi

当我们拥有时
我们总是埋怨自己没有些什么

当我们失去时
我们却忘记自己曾经拥有些什么

我们害怕岁月
却不知道活着是多么可喜

我们以为生存已经没有意思
许多人却在生死之间挣扎

回忆是从来不琐碎的
经过岁月的魔法
甚至比当天更动人
而我认为
生活本身其实就是一种魔法

有一种人
总是不停地寻找
寻找几生几世
仍然单身一人
我知道谁都没错
那人只是想拥有世界上最完美的东西
比如
心的安心温馨停泊处

正因为受苦
我们了解人的有限
便对上天多一份敬虔庄重

也正因为受苦
我们看到的人无限
便对生命多一份珍惜尊重

美国名校著名演讲汇集

下面的东东,我要利用闲暇的时间,一个个整理出来。找不到中文翻译的,就自己动手翻译。

斯坦福大学(待整理)

哈佛大学:
* 2008年:小说《哈利波特》作者J.K. Rowling

(参见:http://blog.sina.com.cn/s/blog_5383db3b0100aoxc.html)

* 2007年: 微软公司创始人Bill Gates

(参见:http://blog.sina.com.cn/s/blog_5383db3b0100ap06.html )

* 2006年: 著名记者Jim Lehrer

* 2005年: 著名演员John Lithgow

* 2004年: 联合国秘书长Kofi Annan

* 2003年: 墨西哥前总统Ernesto Zedillo

斯坦福大学’09 Anthony Kennedy毕业典礼演讲

Text of Justice Kennedy’s 2009 Commencement Address

Following is the text of the address by U.S. Supreme Court Justice Anthony Kennedy, as prepared for delivery at Stanford University’s 118th Commencement on June 14, 2009

L.A. Cicero

Anthony M. Kennedy

President Hennessey, graduating students, and my fellow citizens in a world that must seek to come ever closer to the idea and reality of freedom under law. Thank you for inviting me to your Commencement. There is now clear evidence that, with President Hennessey, I have become a willing accomplice in the wacky walk.
Hennessey校长、毕业生们、以及我的那些在法律下追寻自由的理想与现实的公民朋友们,谢谢你们邀请我来参加你们的毕业典礼。现在,以Hennessey为证,有清晰的证据表明我已经在”Wacky walk”中成为了一个自愿的同谋。(注:“Wacky Walk”是斯坦福大学毕业典礼的一个特色,他们允许毕业生进场时穿著奇装异服。例如,有一年的“Wacky Walk”有男毕业生仅穿著一条内裤在操场上玩飞盘,有学生穿戴布偶道具进场。)

Each of you graduates has your own story of the years at Stanford. Your story is bound up with your parents, your family and the loved ones who sustained you here. You—indeed all of us and the entire Nation—owe them warmest thanks.
你们每一位毕业生们都有你们在斯坦福的岁月的故事。你们的故事一定是和你们的父母、家庭、以及在这里支持你们的人紧紧联系在一起。你们-事实上,我们所有人以及整个国家-都应该向他们致以最温暖的谢意。

Freedom must remain a central part of your story. From the beginning of our Republic, Americans have defined freedom by a moral principle. It is this: With our own freedom comes the duty to secure it for others. Freedom is the birthright of all. When we help others find freedom, we save our own.
“自由”一定仍然会是你们故事的中心部分。从我们的共和国创立开始,美国就用道德准则对自由进行了定义。那个定义是这样的:与我们自己的自由随之而来的,是保护他人自由的责任。自由是每个人与生俱来的权利。当我们帮助他人找到自由的同时,我们也拯救了自己。

Now, two people or two million people or two billion people cannot enjoy freedom without rules. So freedom goes hand in hand with law. This is just high school civics stuff. No surprise here. But the principles are so fundamental that it seems appropriate to discuss them at your commencement, as you consider how best to shape your life and your work.
两个人、两百万人或两亿人都不能够没有任何规则的情况享受自由。自由是和法律密切相关的。这仅仅是高中时的公民教育知识,在这里没有任何惊奇之处。但是其原理却是自由的基本法则,因此,在你们的毕业典礼,当你们在考虑如何更好地规划你们的人生和职业的问题时,来讨论这些问题,看起来仍然是合适的。

Americans have the responsibility to try to advance law and freedom in other places. The task is daunting. For the stark truth is this: more than half the world lacks either the will or the power to embrace law and freedom as we know it. In struggling nations the jury on whether to pursue law and freedom is a jury that is still out. In the long run our last, best security is in the realm of ideas. It is urgent for our Nation and for you as young people to strive to make the case for the idea of law and freedom. We must make that case to a doubting world. On this question, the world must not be in search of two different destinies.
美国具有努力将法律和自由在世界上的其他地方推进的责任。这个任务是令人畏惧的。因为这种现状是绝对真实的:世界上超过一半的地方缺乏拥抱法律和自由的意愿或者能力。在一些(和苦难)斗争的民族,是否追求法律和自由还不得而知。我们持久的、最佳的安全长期停留在想象中。对我们的民族以及你们这些年轻人来说,已经到了非常紧迫的时刻来证实法律和自由的思想。我们必须向一个犹疑不定的世界来证实法律和自由。在这个问题上,我们的世界一定不是在追寻两种不同的命运。

When lawyers make their case to a jury, they sometimes have a few hours. Attorneys in our Court have thirty minutes a side. Today, in order not to trespass upon your patience or delay your celebration, I shall take but eleven minutes more to make the case about your duties as the newest trustees of freedom.
当律师向陪审团出示证据的时候,他们有时只有几个小时的时间。在我们的法庭上,双方的代理律师各有30分钟的时间。今天,为了不打扰你们的耐心或推迟你们的毕业典礼,我将占用11分钟的时间,向你们证实你们作为自由的最新受托人的责任。

We must be willing to persuade others to make law and freedom central in their own lives and their own Nation. For the past twenty years or so I have tried to visit China often to teach. Of course, on any given day, as in any classroom in any place, some students may fold their arms over their chests, the universal sign of resistance to the message or the messenger.
我们一定是愿意说服其他人,让法律和自由成为他们的生活以及他们国家的中心。在过去的20年左右的时间中,我试图经常访问中国并讲学。当然,在任何一天,在任何地点任何教室,一些学生都会将他们的胳膊架在他们的胸前,这是对演讲人所带来的消息表示抵抗的普遍标志。

Still, there is an audience of eager students. They appear at least willing to consider finding common ground to pursue a common cause. This last fall China opened its first law school on the American model, a three year graduate program. The problem was how to select the entering class of about one hundred students from thousands of applicants. For those one hundred or so places there were thousands of highly qualified applicants, scientists and engineers, artists and humanities majors. The list was trimmed again, and then the committee decided to have interviews. One of the questions was: what inspired you to go to law school? Any number of students answered that it was a movie. Chinese students like to build their language skills by watching movies from England and the United States. So I thought, well, the movie that inspired them was 12 Angry Men, or To Kill a Mockingbird, or Witness for the Prosecution. Wrong answer. The movie was: Legally Blonde.
但是仍然会有对我的演讲内容非常渴望的观众。他们至少希望能够找到共同的基础来寻求共同的目标. 去年秋季,中国成立了它的第一个仿照美国模式的法律学校,一个三年的研究生计划。问题在于如何从上千个申请者中选择一百个学生进入这个计划。对这一百个左右的席位,有上千个高质量的申请者,它们中有科学家、工程师、艺术家以及其他来自人文专业的人。这个名单精简后,委员会决定进行面试。其中一个问题是:什么激励你来到法律学校?很多学生回答说这是源于一个电影。中国的学生喜欢通过看英国和美国电影来提高他们的英语水平。因此我猜想,那个激励了他们对法律热情的电影可能是《12怒汉》,或是《杀死一只知更鸟(to kill a mockingbird)》或是《控方证人(witness for the prosecution)》。但我错了,那个电影是《律政俏佳人》.

After watching the movie and then talking to the students at the new school, we found an explanation. The movie, after graduating from a college in California, depicts a young woman who decides to go to a famed, rigorous law school in the East. She is, or so it seems at first, the very caricature of some one so frivolous and naïve that the audience cannot take her seriously. So when she goes to the law school she takes a serious risk. She must enter a new, unfamiliar, unfriendly, threatening, small universe, one formerly closed to her. These Chinese students were taking a risk like that.
在这个新的学校看过电影并和学生谈过话之后,我们发现了其中的原因。这个电影叙述了一个从加利福尼亚的一个学校毕业的年轻女人决定到东部的一所有名的、很严格的法学院就读。起初,她看上去夸张地轻浮、愚蠢,以至于大家都不拿她当回事。所以她来读法学院是相当冒险的。她必须进入一个新的、不熟悉的、不友好的、有威胁的、对他封闭的小圈子。这些中国学生所冒的风险就像这个女主角一样。

You must prepare to take some risks to make the case. You may enter a realm of ideas or a real world place where freedom is not just in doubt but opposed. You must find inventive, new ways to make the case for freedom. And to be prepared for this role, to be prepared to confront the reality of half a world without law and freedom, you must know what is at stake.
在提出论点时,你必须准备承担风险。你也许进入了一个这样的思想或一个现实的地方,在那里自由不仅仅存在疑问,而且人们反对自由。你必须找到富有创造力的、新的方式来推动自由。为这个角色做准备,并且面对世界上一半的国家都没有法律和自由,你必须知道这样做的危险。

You must know that in Sri Lanka over a thousand people a year go to jail for three hundred sixty-five days for want of a one dollar fine.
你必须知道,在斯里兰卡每年有超过一千人因为一美元的罚金而入狱365天。

You must know that there is an African country where a woman who is raped must pay five dollars to file a complaint with the police.
你必须知道,有一个非洲国家,一个被强奸的女人必须支付5美元才能够向警察投诉。

You must know that each year eight hundred thousand people – mostly women and children – are the subject of capture and trafficking for slavery and sexual exploitation. Human trafficking is one of the world’s most profitable businesses.
你必须知道,每年有80万人(大部分是妇女和儿童)被拐卖而遭受奴役和性剥削。人口拐卖是全球最暴利的生意。

All of these failings come from the absence of the rule of law. You would think this would be clear to everyone. It is surprising, though, that the concept escapes so many.
所有这些都是由于法律的匮乏。你也许认为这对每个人都是很清楚的事情。但令人惊讶的是,这个概念被很多人忽视了。

In 1978, Alexander Solzhenitsyn gave a commencement speech. It was puzzling at first that, in a speech moving in so many other ways, he attacked the West for being too devoted to the law. After a few days I reached this conclusion: his understanding of law was simply different from our own. For him the concept, the history, the meaning of law made it a diktat, a ukase, a cold threat, a decree. We believe otherwise. For us the law is not an obstacle but the instrument of progress; not a command to be feared but a hope to be embraced; not a threat but a promise.
在1978年,亚历山大·索尔仁尼琴(俄罗斯流亡作家)做了一个毕业典礼的演讲。 起初令我困惑的是,他从多个角度攻击西方太致力于法治的建设。几天后,我得出这样一个结论:他对法治的理解和我们对法治的理解是不同的。在他的概念和对历史的理解里面,法律是绝对的命令、是谕旨、是冷酷的威胁,是判决。而我们相信法律是另外的东西。对我们来说,法律不是前进的阻碍,而是工具;不是令人畏惧的命令,而是让我们拥抱的希望;不是威胁而是承诺。

Let me give you another example of how absence of law takes away the chance for freedom. A recent U.N. Commission studied a populous, struggling country, and asked this question: “Suppose you want to open a bakery. How hard is it to get a business license?” The answer was: It takes over five hundred working days; over twenty agencies; and the cost is in excess of three and a half months wages for a skilled worker. So there is the other choice: pay a bribe and support a corrupt government where bribery itself is justified as the way to subsist.
这里让我给你们另一个例子,法律如何

The chance to build and own a small business is an essential part of any economy that seeks to establish law and freedom. That is why we want many of you to have economic success. A certain economic self sufficiency is necessary if we are to have some voice in planning our own destiny. This is essential in a world where governments are always waiting in the wings, all too eager to plan our destiny for us. And, as the bakery example shows, the legal infrastructure in over half the world cannot or will not allow the dream or the hope of owning a small business.

And in those same parts of the world neither can the legal infrastructure support basic improvements that engineers and builders otherwise could construct in short order. But you cannot build, say, a modern water system if there is no honest legal system to maintain it.

Consider the water crisis in the sub-Sahara. You have seen pictures of a stately, dignified woman in a flowing gown with a water jug on her head. That jug weighs more than the luggage allowance at the airport. The hours, the human hours, the toilsome hours, the heart-wrenching, backbreaking hours a woman spends just trying to bring water to the family are staggering.

By cautious estimates, on the African continent alone it takes over sixteen billion hours each year to bring water to the family. That is sixteen billion with a B. But new water systems cannot be built and maintained where corruption holds sway. This is not just because of the lack of money; it is because of the lack of law and property rights.

There are some who say your generation has less power than previous ones because a more interdependent world reduces our power to make unilateral policy choices. In my view this understates your capacity and potential. You are among a new generation of university graduates who see an interconnectedness in our world and its universe that far surpasses what previous generations could understand. An interconnected universe is manifest in all fields of learning and endeavors. The earth sciences teach this in a concrete, formal way. Science, and in particular quantum physics and astrophysics, may soon yield stunning explanations of dark matter and of our common link to the universe. As is evident in the new communications technology, this more interconnected world touches all of our work and culture, over the whole range of the sciences, law and business, and the arts and letters. “Legally blonde” in a law school a half a world away. The new awareness gives you new power. You have a potential to design and to create and to define and to project your own life and work, a potential far greater than given to your predecessors.

As you think how best to advance the idea of law and the freedom that it secures, please remember that you must understand our own heritage of freedom. This brings us back to the point of beginning. When the Americans rebelled, the world was puzzled. We said we wanted freedom, but it seemed to England and Europe that we were already the freest people the world knew. So we had to act at once to send a fax or an email explaining our case. This was the Declaration of Independence, and then, some eleven years later, came the Constitution of the United States. The result was, and has been this: As Americans we look to the Declaration of Independence, to the Constitution, to our heritage of freedom to define who we are. And let there be no doubt: This dynamic, by which the documents of liberty are part of our self identity, part of our self image, is the envy of oppressed peoples. But this linkage, this connection between the history of freedom and who we are can disappear if we ignore its dynamic force.

So it follows that the Constitution does not belong just to judges and attorneys. It is yours. And with this possession come serious responsibilities. It is not just the President who must preserve, protect, and defend the Constitution. All of us must do so. But you cannot preserve what you do not revere; you cannot protect what you have not learned; you cannot defend what you do not know.

If we are conscious of the heritage that defines us we are empowered in a special way. We come to this inevitable conclusion: law and freedom become even more priceless when we give them to others. That is why law and freedom are an ultimate expression of the human spirit. As Americans we know this and, indeed, we have the inward sense that it must be true.

This insight and empowerment can become all the greater for you who have studied at Stanford. Whatever your area of study, whatever your career, whatever deep personal hopes and aspirations you have, you should understand their basis in law and freedom. You must use this knowledge and power to work with your counterparts here and in other nations to advance law and freedom in your own time. If you do so, later generations will be more secure. And later generations will be grateful for the resolve you made here, for the resolve you made at this University, here at Stanford, here on this day, the day of your commencement.

Thank you. We wish you well.

Carmen Dell’Orefice(转载自 建一 博客)

下面是王建一 老师博客里面的一篇博文:

锤炼优雅的气质
王建一

何谓优雅?这是很难表达的一种气质,字面也许是优美高雅,但是,其中所蕴含的韵味,可能不是用语言轻易讲清的。
优雅的人,或许也不是一句两句话可以概括的。

出生于1931年的美国模特卡门·戴尔·奥利菲斯是现今T台上最年长的模特,年近78岁的她一派冰山女王的风度,在她身上使用频率最高的形容词是“单纯”和“优雅”。

卡门标志性的银发被专业人士称为具有一种“凌厉的优雅”,她 一米八的身高和修长的双腿可以胜任任何品味的服装。一位与她合作过的人在接受采访时说:“在她那里,你听不到任何关于脚痛或睡眠不足的抱怨。她的笑容总是温暖明快,她用整洁、谦逊和守时的专业态度超越了年轻模特。”

是啊,在这种褒奖后面,一定有卡门·戴尔·奥利菲斯的付出和努力。优雅,是练就的,不是天生的。美貌缘于天生,但是优雅一定来自后天的锤炼。这样的人,一定对自己要求甚严,无论从修养到作派、从谈吐到衣着、从态度到精神,都是高标准的人。否则,优雅不可能附身,也无从谈起。

每个人都年轻过,但不一定每个人都可以优雅。像卡门·戴尔·奥利菲斯一样优雅终生,或许是一种不错的选择。

e4bea7e99da2
e7baa2
ok

最美的风景

今天在晓雪博客上看到几句话,真好,记下来:

“出了趟有点儿久的远门,先去瑞士旅行,再去巴黎时装周……
再次体验到出门的最大好处:眼界放大,心界放宽;见到世界之大,无奇不有;高山流水,小城旖旎,时刻可以感受到人间不经意的令人动容的点滴风景之美.感动之余,感受到自己的渺小和微不足道,感受到简单的快乐和满足。”

“人生从来就没有过不去的坎儿,也没有值得不断炫耀的风光,最美的风景,永远在前面。”

恋爱的犀牛

第一次看恋爱的犀牛是在人艺还是北大大讲堂,已经记不清楚了。马路是段奕宏演的,以至于n年后看电影《爱有来生》的时候,突然意识到这个男主角就是马路时,可真是心里一惊,又萌生了再看一遍犀牛的念头。只是,这次的演员已经换了。
第一次看犀牛,有说不出来的滋味,夸张的台词,夸张的抒情、幽默甚至讽刺,夹杂在一起,知道这不是都市言情话剧,也不是为追求“先锋”而“先锋”的戏。无疑,它里面有东西,否则,怎么会几年来重演了近300场还“阴魂不散”?而且,导演还扬言要演到1000场?这次看,先重温一下编剧廖一梅写的一段话吧,甚有回味:

1
  波兰斯基在他的回忆录里说:我懂得了爱情与喜剧、体育和音乐没有不同,在享受爱的同时,人们可以感到生活轻松自如……他有此感受的时候大约三十出头,《水中刀》刚刚获得奥斯卡最佳外语片奖,正是春风得意,身边很有一些美女。象波兰斯基这样的幸运者的爱情可能是喜剧和音乐,用来装点美丽人生。但是另一些时候,爱是折磨。而对我来说,正是这种折磨有着异乎寻常的力量。为什么是古希腊的悲剧而不是喜剧更能体现人类精神呢?因为令人类能够自己敬重自己的品质都不是轻松愉快的,——而是那些对不可抗拒的命运的倔强态度,保持尊严的神圣企图之类不可轻易谈笑的东西……
  
  《恋爱的犀牛》是一个关于爱情的故事。讲一个男人爱上一个女人,为她作了一个人能作的一切。剧中的主角马路是别人眼中的偏执狂,如他朋友所说——过分夸大了一个女人和另一个女人之间的差别,在人人都懂得明智选择的今天,算是人群中的犀牛——实属异类。所谓“明智”,便是不去作不可能、不合逻辑和吃力不讨好的事,在有着无数可能,无数途径,无数选择的现代社会,人人都能找到自己的最佳位置,都能在情感和实利之间找到一个明智的平衡支点,避免落到一个自己痛苦,别人耻笑的境地。这是马路所不会的,也是我所不喜欢的。不单感情,所有的事都是如此——没有偏执就没有新的创举,就没有新的境界,就没有你想也想不到的新的开始。
  
  爱是自己的东西,没有什么人真正值得倾其所有去爱。但有了爱,可以帮助你战胜生命中的种种虚妄,以最长的触角伸向世界,伸向你自己不曾发现的内部,开启所有平时麻木的感官,超越积年累月的倦怠,剥掉一层层世俗的老茧,把自己最柔软的部分暴露在外。因为太柔软了,痛触必然会随之而来,但没有了与世界,与人最直接的感受,我们活着是为了什么呢?
  2
  “爱之于我,不是肌肤之亲,不是一蔬一饭,它是一种不死的欲望,是疲惫生活中的英雄梦想。”我喜欢的杜拉斯的话。
  3
  马路说:“忘掉是一般人能做的唯一的事,但是我决定不忘掉她。”
  4
  剧中人有具体的情境,具体的职业&具体的个人遭遇,但这些都不具有实际意义。
  我希望看过戏的观众,能感到他的生命中有一些东西是值得坚持的,可以坚持的。至于爱情的结局不是这个戏里所关心的。

3月 6, 2008

什么是真爱

这里,搜集一些有意思的关于真爱的话。真爱,对家庭的,对爱人的,也有不同的含义。
不管怎样,真爱是一个需要学习的东西,更是一个通过实践去学习的东西。

泰戈尔:”Let my love, like sunlight, surround you and yet give you illumined freedom.”
“我的爱像阳光一样包围着你,同时我给你光辉灿烂的自由。”

杜拉斯:”爱之于我,不是肌肤之亲,不是一蔬一饭,它是一种不死的欲望,是疲惫生活中的英雄梦想”

伯特-海灵格:”非常融洽的伴侣之间平衡地付出和收取,为了维护这个平衡,每一方必须尽其所能地满足对方,并坦然接受对方的奉献。如果某一方习惯付出或收取过多,或对对方充满爱意的付出敷衍了事时,爱所必需的付出和收取之间最基本的平衡就会面临威胁。”

逆境(3)

My third story is about death.
我的第三个故事,是关于死亡。

When I was 17, I read a quote that went something like: “If you live each day as if it was your last, someday you’ll most certainly be right.” It made an impression on me, and since then, for the past 33 years, I have looked in the mirror every morning and asked myself: “If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?” And whenever the answer has been “No” for too many days in a row, I know I need to change something.
当我十七岁时,我读到一则格言,好像是「把每一天都当成生命中的最后一天,你就会轻松自在。( If you live each day as if it was your last,someday you’ll most certainly be right )」(听众笑)这对我影响深远, 在过去 33 年里,我每天早上都会照镜子,自问:「如果今天是此生最后一日,我今天要做些什么?」每当我连续太多天都得到一个「没事做」的答案时, 我就知道我必须有所改变了。

Remembering that I’ll be dead soon is the most important tool I’ve ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Because almost everything — all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure - these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart.
提醒自己快死了,是我在人生中面临重大决定时,所用过最重要的方法。因为几乎每件事-所有外界期望、所有的名声、所有对困窘或失败的恐惧-在面对死亡时,都消失了,只有最真实重要的东西才会留下.提醒自己快死了,是我所知避免掉入畏惧失去的陷阱里最好的方法。人生不带来、死不带去,没理由不跟随你的内心。

About a year ago I was diagnosed with cancer. I had a scan at 7:30 in the morning, and it clearly showed a tumor on my pancreas. I didn’t even know what a pancreas was. The doctors told me this was almost certainly a type of cancer that is incurable, and that I should expect to live no longer than three to six months. My doctor advised me to go home and get my affairs in order, which is doctor’s code for prepare to die. It means to try to tell your kids everything you thought you’d have the next 10 years to tell them in just a few months. It means to make sure everything is buttoned up so that it will be as easy as possible for your family. It means to say your goodbyes.
一年前,我被诊断出癌症,我在早间七点半作断层扫瞄,在胰脏清楚出现一个肿瘤,我连胰脏是什么都不知道。医生告诉我,那几乎可以确定是一种不治之症,预计我大概活不到三到六个月了。医生建议我回家,好好跟亲人们聚一聚,这是医生对临终病人的标准建议。那代表你得试着在几个月内把你将来十年想跟小孩讲的话讲完。那代表你得把每件事情搞定,家人才会尽量轻松。那代表你得跟人说再见了。

I lived with that diagnosis all day. Later that evening I had a biopsy, where they stuck an endoscope down my throat, through my stomach and into my intestines, put a needle into my pancreas and got a few cells from the tumor. I was sedated, but my wife, who was there, told me that when they viewed the cells under a microscope the doctors started crying because it turned out to be a very rare form of pancreatic cancer that is curable with surgery. I had the surgery and I’m fine now.
我整天想着那个诊断结果,那天晚上做了一次切片,从喉咙伸入一个内视镜,穿过胃进到肠子,将探针伸进胰脏,取了一些肿瘤细胞出来。我打了镇静剂,不醒人事,但是我老婆在场。她后来跟我说,当医生们用显微镜看过那些细胞后,他们都哭了,因为那是非常少见的一种胰脏癌,可以用手术治好。所以我接受了手术,康复了。(听众鼓掌)

This was the closest I’ve been to facing death, and I hope its the closest I get for a few more decades. Having lived through it, I can now say this to you with a bit more certainty than when death was a useful but purely intellectual concept:
这是我最接近死亡的时候,我希望那会继续是未来几十年内最接近的一次。经历此事后,我可以比先前死亡只是纯粹想象时,要能更肯定地告诉你们下面这些:

No one wants to die. Even people who want to go to heaven don’t want to die to get there. And yet death is the destination we all share. No one has ever escaped it. And that is as it should be, because Death is very likely the single best invention of Life. It is Life’s change agent. It clears out the old to make way for the new. Right now the new is you, but someday not too long from now, you will gradually become the old and be cleared away. Sorry to be so dramatic, but it is quite true.
没有人想死。即使那些想上天堂的人,也想活着上天堂。 (听众笑)但是死亡是我们共同的终点,没有人逃得过。这是注定的,因为死亡很可能就是生命中最棒的发明,是生命交替的媒介,送走老人们,给新生代开出道路。现在你们是新生代,但是不久的将来,你们也会逐渐变老,被送出人生的舞台。抱歉讲得这么戏剧化,但是这是真的。

Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma — which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.
你们的时间有限,所以不要浪费时间活在别人的生活里。不要被教条所局限– 盲从教条就是活在别人思考结果里。不要让别人的意见淹没了你内在的心声。最重要的,拥有追随自己内心与直觉的勇气,你的内心与直觉多少已经知道你真正想要成为什么样的人(have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become),任何其它事物都是次要的。(听众鼓掌)

When I was young, there was an amazing publication called The Whole Earth Catalog, which was one of the bibles of my generation. It was created by a fellow named Stewart Brand not far from here in Menlo Park, and he brought it to life with his poetic touch. This was in the late 1960’s, before personal computers and desktop publishing, so it was all made with typewriters, scissors, and polaroid cameras. It was sort of like Google in paperback form, 35 years before Google came along: it was idealistic, and overflowing with neat tools and great notions.
在我年轻时,有本神奇的杂志叫做 《Whole Earth Catalog》, 当年这可是我们的经典读物。那是位住在离这不远的 Menlo Park的Stewart Brand发行的,他把杂志办得很有诗意。那是 1960年代末期,个人计算机跟桌上出版还没出现,所有内容都是打字机、剪刀跟拍立得相机做出来的。 杂志内容有点像印在纸上的平面 Google,在Google 出现之前35年就有了:这本杂志很理想主义,充满新奇工具与伟大的见解。

Stewart and his team put out several issues of The Whole Earth Catalog, and then when it had run its course, they put out a final issue. It was the mid-1970s, and I was your age. On the back cover of their final issue was a photograph of an early morning country road, the kind you might find yourself hitchhiking on if you were so adventurous. Beneath it were the words: “Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish.” It was their farewell message as they signed off. Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish. And I have always wished that for myself. And now, as you graduate to begin anew, I wish that for you.
Stewart 跟他的团队出版了好几期的《Whole Earth Catalog》, 然后很自然的,最后出了停刊号。当时是 1970 年代中期,我正是你们现在这个年龄的时候。在停刊号的封底,有张清晨乡间小路的照片,那种你四处搭便车冒险旅行时会经过的乡间小路。在照片下印了行小字:求知若饥,虚心若愚(Stay Hungry , Stay Foolish)。那是他们亲笔写下的告别讯息,我总是以此自许。 当你们毕业,展开新生活,我也以此祝福你们。

下一页 »